Chris with the Sun Off His Forehead

Here's my friend Chris standing outside the Kerckhoff Coffeehouse. Chris and I share many traits: 1) we both lived in Colorado as youths, 2) we're both losers with love and computer architecture, 3) neither of us has had braces or eyeglasses, and 4) we're both more inclined to pursue non-computer-related careers. In his spare time, Chris enjoys a witty book, a fine beverage, and short Asian girls. Well noted for his interest in socio-political economics, he once passed up a chance to see Tyra Banks on campus in order to see William "The Refrigerator" Perry speak (or rather, eat). "It's incredible," Chris remarked, "how he can both be the Secretary of Defense as well as a force to be reckoned with on the the line of scrimmage."